screwed up big time

i drank like crazy yesterday and did not wake up in the morning. given the amount of exposure i had that was just plain crazy, but i'm tired of trading and i just didn't give a damn. i've had a great time doing this full time, but it's clear to me that it's time has come and i need to get a full time job and do this on the side. i am pretty sure that i will be a much better trader, if i don't think about this the whole time. plus it will be nice to work with other people again.

anyhoo, i didn't wake up and paid a heavy price. i would have broken even on IBM in the morning. i would have made a small profit on BNI and could have closed my entire position in that stock. IBM is still within target range, but BNI ran up another 2 dollars. it's on a monster breakout and my position in it is definitely hurting. but, i have 3 more weeks and this stock can tank just as fast as it's run up. hopefully, oil will make another run above 130, which is likely, and the stock market will dive one more time (for me). but, overall i am not making profits and that is pissing me off. maybe it was just a tough week, but i haven't been able to tell where stocks are going. all rationale seems to be out of the door.

i am burnt out. i should have taken that vacation to Jamaica like i wanted to. i would have only spent 2K on it and i already lost more than that dicking around.

too early

i started shorting BNI too early...it ran up something huge today. i might break even on it, but if i had waited i could have made some serious money on it. i got rid of my HPQ position, just couldn't wait any longer for it to turn the corner. plus with the coming weekend...oops, in the case of HPQ there would have been very little premium to lose. in any case this dog has had his day and we need to invest in other venues.

i have been sloppy in trading lately. my heart has not been in it. don't know what to do.

maybe this weekend i will go somewhere. or nowhere.

tough day

i was not on point today. i had a bad feeling about the IBM puts and should have sold them at the open for a .20 cent profit, but i was greedy and lost .80 cents on them each. Ouch !!! i went back to sleep after that fiasco and for the rest of the day kinda drifted around. i got rid of my NUE position, break even on 10 and small loss on other. I was debating whether to hold them, but NUE was up 2.4 and i didn't feel like tempting the gods. i bought some IBM puts and i feel fairly good about them, but IBM is busting out, so i have to be very careful with them.

i was jonesing for Coke all evening and then finally i went and got some. it was divine.

slow day

i slept through most of the morning. i kept a lazy eye on the market thereafter and except for a feeling at one point that i should go long, which i didn't act on, due to cooking food and building my resume, i missed that brief opportunity. in the afternoon i watched tv and watched Oil fall. i am not sure it's done, but the buzz is for a downward trend. NEVER FIGHT THE TREND. i shorted IBM towards the end of the day for an overnight play.

i need beer. i love my family, but they stress me out. know what i mean.

Friday, May 23 post

i took the day off to hang out with the family. markets are closed on Monday, May 26th also. I checked in the afternoon and NUE was doing badly, due to the extra shares they just issued. the issue price was 74, which was good though. that's my break even point also. Friday's sell off was unusual IMHO. definitely oversold. i put in an offer to buy MER at 43, but it never got filled. it gapped to 44 on tuesday. sigh.

no pic as nothing was traded.

friday-d-day and long weekend coming up

tumultous week. my long positions not doing so well, especially HPQ, but otherwise i am ok. i bought a bunch of calls on MER (merrill) and NUE (steel). first time in a while that i am buying on valuation. Mer at 44 is damn cheap and NUE at 74 is insane cheap. if they don't bump up on Friday, i might hold them till next week. my Oil short on USO went very well. I might become an Oil day trader yet. NYMEX here i come !!!

going out for a couple of beers. tomorrow is my Dad's graduation from Executive MBA program. Shout out to my 60 year old Dad for putting in the 2 years of work.

i feel good

i woke up in a grumpy mood, because i didn't get much sleep last night and looking at the market i couldn't tell dinky donkey shit which way it was going to go or what to do. plus i didn't really care and so i sat there watching CNBC idiots. DRYS was going up nicely and my STLD puts, which i was afraid about, were within the strike zone of small loss. I said "what the hell" TM, put in sell orders for both for prices which i thought were reasonable and went back to sleep.

i get up at 1:30pm and both my orders are sold and at the BEST prices of the day. DRYS only went .50 cents higher from where i sold it and STLD's low of the day was where i sold and then it zoomed off in the opposite direction. I RULE !!!

sadly, my MER and HPQ calls are taking a beating. MER i am still optimistic about, but HPQ i think i will have to take a loss of 1-3K. thank GOD, i only went into earnings with 20 calls, i had 30 the day before. but, see that was good RISK management. YAY me !!!

over the afternoon my mood has improved and mostly i fooled around reading blogs and tormenting AAPL longs on the Yahoo message board. that's my favorite hangout to talk shit. I bought some NUE calls hoping for a bump and also shorted OIL, by buying puts on USO. Nue i had a chance to sell at close for decent profits, but a little birdy called GREED was chirping on my shoulders. oh well, i do have to pay my parking tickets somehow.

i need cigarettes. ran out last night. ate some indian candy for lunch.